Read: Genesis 32-34
Focus Verse: “Then Jacob prayed, ‘O God of my father Abraham, God of my father Isaac, LORD, you who said to me, ‘Go back to your country and your relatives, and I will make you prosper,’ I am unworthy of all the kindness and faithfulness you have shown your servant. I had only my staff when I crossed this Jordan, but now I have become two camps. Save me, I pray, from the hand of my brother Easu, for I am afraid he will come and attack me, and also the mothers with their children.” (32:9-11).
Devotion: I’m not so sure Jacob trusts what God is calling him to. His prayer suggests he trusts that God can protect him, but his reluctance to go home and his fixation on thinking his brother wants to kill him shows a great deal of internal struggle. He’s been gone for 20 years and he’s still fearful his brother wants to take his life. He’s been holding on to that fear for 20 years! Every step of the way home Jacob is nervous, anxious, and fearful. He does everything he can to try and appease his brother and control the situation. But you can’t force anyone to do anything, or control every situation. God is with him and calling him to return home, yet he pushes back because of his anxiety and insecurity. His assumptions on what someone else will do cause him to freeze, so far to the point where he literally is alone (32:21). I think that his wrestling with God in Ch 32 is caused because he’s alone and still not trusting to follow God all the way home to Easu. He is allowing his fear and anxiety of the future to hold him in place, yet this is something that is out of his control. What ends up actually happening is the opposite of his assumptions! Easu RUNS to embrace his brother Jacob! (33:4) Easu invites him home and shows him love and kindness! Even after his assumptions are shattered, and he is met with love Jacob lies so he can run away. Easu met him with open arms much like God welcomes us home into his arms. What keeps Jacob, and often times keeps us from staying in the loving embrace of God? Like Jacob, insecurity that is fueled by a fear based on assumptions, often times on things out of our control. However, when we have God on our side, when God calls us to something, why should we worry about things out of our control, like what others think or do?
Pray: LORD remind me that I have shelter and rest in you. Help me work through and get rid of my fear and anxiety so that I may rest in your loving embrace.
Additional Scripture: “Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” (Psalm 91:1)